Why is CONGRATULATIONS a word I would like to at all costs avoid? I mean, what else can you say? I asked my Dad this on Sunday, and he said "Good on ya." "Way to go", "Good one". and I was like what, someone get's married and you say "Good for you." ????
So then he says to me "Why do you ask?" and I said, oh, it's just something I was thinking about today, trying to figure out, to which he says " holy geez..GET SOME REST!" To which I laughed people, oh, I laughed. I was TIRED!
I had phoned him to wish him a Happy Thanksgiving. I could audibly hear him roll his eyes. "Oh, yeah, that's really.." right up your alley, eh Dad? Really rings your bell eh?
Money cannot be eaten people. What the hieeeelll is with the huge WALL STREET bailout anyway right?? People in Detroit are standing on the Bruce Springsteen, John Cougar Mellencamp poor people line, and people with Ferraris get to eat an extra sandwhich for lunch. My rent is late - Hey WORLD BANK bail me out PLAYERS! Money cannot be eaten. But it can be spent! On a $300 dollar feather head piece that I dont even need! Oh yes it can!
I totally need to find a reason, ie; make a reason, to wear this thing. It's been sitting on my dresser for two years collecting dust (granted, my feathers are a liiiitttle higher than this one) and it's pretty much just become a novelty piece. That and my 4 inch Zebra heels that make me look like a freaking STORK. 9'12 people. Should I wear them together? Tall Thalia, check please, TAXI!
My Dad has been under a little bit of pressure, taking on the world courts for the genocide of the First Nations people. He's also hearing stories about Residential school horrors that are totally taking their toll on him due to the horrifyingly depressing nature and pain that they bring up being that my Dad is perhaps overly empathetic. Pass the salt!
Because of these things, I let it slide when I noticed him not really listening to me or paying full attention to our conversation. (I got you Katie. we good sister) I was like "Hey Pops, what are you watching the game or something?" "No. just clicking through." I thought he meant clicking through what I was saying..then I was like HEY! YOU'RE CLICKING THROUGH THE CHANNELS! NOT through what I'm saying. YOU ARE WATCHING TV!!!! HEY!
Let's wrap this up like a donair then! Roll it out like a bowling ball! I'm stoked that despite the pressure he is under I can make him chuckle. I mean, don't even get me started, once he starts laughing my Dad style jokes just start flowing 'til he's doubled over with laughter and nearly coughs up a lung.Hey Katie - making Sean, Forde or Dad laugh - What's better? Honestly?
The sense of supreme satisfaction it brings. High Rolling Dawg, Big Pimping Player. Why does Snoop Dog use an Umbrella?? FO' DRIZZLE. Only he totally didn't get that one to which I say FLOP!
So then he says to me "Why do you ask?" and I said, oh, it's just something I was thinking about today, trying to figure out, to which he says " holy geez..GET SOME REST!" To which I laughed people, oh, I laughed. I was TIRED!
I had phoned him to wish him a Happy Thanksgiving. I could audibly hear him roll his eyes. "Oh, yeah, that's really.." right up your alley, eh Dad? Really rings your bell eh? 
Money cannot be eaten people. What the hieeeelll is with the huge WALL STREET bailout anyway right?? People in Detroit are standing on the Bruce Springsteen, John Cougar Mellencamp poor people line, and people with Ferraris get to eat an extra sandwhich for lunch. My rent is late - Hey WORLD BANK bail me out PLAYERS! Money cannot be eaten. But it can be spent! On a $300 dollar feather head piece that I dont even need! Oh yes it can! 
I totally need to find a reason, ie; make a reason, to wear this thing. It's been sitting on my dresser for two years collecting dust (granted, my feathers are a liiiitttle higher than this one) and it's pretty much just become a novelty piece. That and my 4 inch Zebra heels that make me look like a freaking STORK. 9'12 people. Should I wear them together? Tall Thalia, check please, TAXI!
My Dad has been under a little bit of pressure, taking on the world courts for the genocide of the First Nations people. He's also hearing stories about Residential school horrors that are totally taking their toll on him due to the horrifyingly depressing nature and pain that they bring up being that my Dad is perhaps overly empathetic. Pass the salt!
Because of these things, I let it slide when I noticed him not really listening to me or paying full attention to our conversation. (I got you Katie. we good sister) I was like "Hey Pops, what are you watching the game or something?" "No. just clicking through." I thought he meant clicking through what I was saying..then I was like HEY! YOU'RE CLICKING THROUGH THE CHANNELS! NOT through what I'm saying. YOU ARE WATCHING TV!!!! HEY!
Let's wrap this up like a donair then! Roll it out like a bowling ball! I'm stoked that despite the pressure he is under I can make him chuckle. I mean, don't even get me started, once he starts laughing my Dad style jokes just start flowing 'til he's doubled over with laughter and nearly coughs up a lung.Hey Katie - making Sean, Forde or Dad laugh - What's better? Honestly?
The sense of supreme satisfaction it brings. High Rolling Dawg, Big Pimping Player. Why does Snoop Dog use an Umbrella?? FO' DRIZZLE. Only he totally didn't get that one to which I say FLOP!
2 comments:
Okay wow.
First of all - fo drizzle IS THE BEST JOKE IVE EVER HEARD.
Second. I think making Dad laugh is by far the best because it's so infectious! Then we're all laughing and he's crying and his crows feet are out full force and thats the best face he has.
Making Sean/Forde laugh is like a private little patsy on the back that just makes you feel like a complete and total comic genius. Like suddenly ms. fey is gonna call and as you to write the weekend update.
xo
word verification: chest
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